My apt always gets messy when I’m sick. Or after I get back from a trip with my suitcase thrown down and clothes everywhere. Or when I ignore housework to finish a crafty project that has a firm deadline. With all of these happening in the past 10 days, my apt wasn't looking too good. I spent several hours yesterday putting it all back together again and then some…. I cleaned the latest mold occurrence in my bedroom*, reorganized the bedroom closet and moved some furniture around. I’m not a neat freak by any means, but once in a while I do enjoy spending a day organizing things. Sometimes, it’s because I feel my life has spiraled out of control in some way and so I exert control over what I can, my stuff. Other times, it’s just to reign in the clutter. Yesterday was a little of both. At the end of the day I felt I had straightened up my apt and my thoughts. Today, I’m just sore. Maybe lifting the bed by myself wan’t the best idea.
A day of cleaning yesterday plus being sore today means that I don’t have to go to the gym, right? Whatever, it’s my excuse for today. It doesn’t take much these days to keep me from the gym. For me to go on a regular basis, I have to make it a priority, schedule it in and not deviate. After being sick I should go and do a light workout, but I also want to go to a local stitch & bitch and be social. Now that my major work deadlines are over, I think being social needs to be my priority (over the gym not work). Which is ironic, since if I was slightly more athletic I’d have more social opportunities. Whenever I get the ‘Go Out & Meet People’ pep talk there is the inevitable suggestion of softball leagues. (or ultimate Frisbee, or soccer, etc) Where is it written that every single in their 20’s must join a softball league? Can I just opt out of that part? Organized sports give me awful flashbacks to high school gym.** Which means that I’ll be uncomfortable and feel oh so out of place. And that means me, standing separate from the group, making snarky comments about everything which (surprisingly!) doesn’t always endear me to people.
Another athletic activity with the potential for social interaction is training events. A lot of my friends are training for a half marathon and while I feel a bit left out, even that isn't enough motivation for me to run. I don’t know anything that would be enough motivation for me to run that far. OK, if it were a life & death situation I would. But really, even if I could convince someone to chase me with a lethal weapon during the training sessions, I don’t think that I would consider that a ‘social’ outing. Sure I’d meet new people when they ask me who the masked man running behind me is, but then they might think I was weird. (Just a little bit.) Besides, there is always the risk I’d just stop and say, “Go ahead and kill me. It would be better than running.” So, I’m back to my safe zone, knitting. Yes there are lots of pointy metal needles involved, but I trust that they will not be used to chase me down the street.
*Mold grew on the leather handles of the trunk that I used to take to summer camp during the first mold outbreak and it comes back every few months or so. There isn't mold on the walls so I think the major mold problem was taken care of and this is just a matter of not being able to un-attach and properly clean the damn things. I stepped up the bleach concentration this time and tried to squirt the water into the crevices. I don’t know if it worked, but my room certainly smells like bleach clean.
** Why is it that I, a poor unsuspecting Midwestern kid, was subjected to the torture of the semesterly two mile run, when kids in California only have to do a mile once a year? On a typical gym day we ran a mile or more and then played the game of the moment. Softball, football, soccer, etc. They couldn't start the game until most of the class was done and since I was one of the slowest I was always teased the most. Not that I’m bitter or anything.
I am so with you on organized sports. I am just not that competitive and just plain clumsy and unathletic. One of my happiest moments in high school was leaving my last gym class. Give me yarn and sharp pointy needles any day.
Posted by: Jenn | September 19, 2005 at 10:10 PM
Yeah, I'm having a lot of trouble being motivated to run. It's an issue with the whole training-for-a-race thing.
TWO miles?!?!? That is insane.
Posted by: Carrie | September 20, 2005 at 05:18 AM