Run on Sentences...: family

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family

There are some things that divide the families of the world into categories. And there isn't much room for gray area in these categories. For instance there are the Vaseline families and the non-Vaseline families.

Last year I went out to dinner with a newly married couple and another friend. The newlyweds were describing some time they spent with the groom's family in Ireland. The new bride was making fun of the groom's family, with the grooms help, and I whole heartily laughed along until it came to the suject of Vaseline. She thought it was disgusting that the mom used Vaseline. I said that I used it on my lips every night before going to bed. 'Really?' she said. I went on to describe all the many uses, dry hands or feet, weird rough patches of winter dry skin that are more common in the midwest, etc. That's when an invisible line was drawn on the table. The bride and our friend talked about the inherent grossness of the substance and why anyone would want to use it. The groom and I talked about it's many uses and did we need to run home in shame since we admitted to using the stuff?

There is another division between families that I have become all too aware of since moving to SF. There are the hotel families and the we're staying with you families. Some people's parents come to visit and stay in a cute bed & breakfasts. Or a big fancy hotel downtown. Or the reasonably priced place just down the street. My family comes to visit and I offer up my bed, my futon and and my entire life for the duration. For the most part I wouldn't have it any other way. Talking in our pajamas first thing in the morning or watching my mom fall asleep while watching law and order are the little life moments that I miss by living so far away.

Now that I live on my own, it isn't such a big deal, but having family visit with a roommate presents more considerations. The last time my dad visited I had a roommate and I spent a lot of emotional effort trying to make sure we weren't in her way and that my dad was on his best behavior, etc. For some reason I felt like julie the cruise director and you know what? That job is exhausting. I told my sister that next time dad visited that perhaps i would look into a hotel for a few nights. She acted like I said I would shoot him.

"Really? You'd make dad stay in a hotel?" (implying that it is some sort of torture chamber instead of a nice place with little shampoos)

"Well, yeah, but only for a night or two. Besides he'd probably really like it."

"Did he do something wrong? Why would you make him stay in a hotel?"

I dropped the conversation. Now that I live sans roommate, I told my family that they can stay with me whenever and for whatever time period that they want. The only stipulations are that I may not be able to take time off of work and that I reserve the right to keep my own bed. My dad is flying in today and he will be staying with me, for part of the time at least. The ironic thing is that he will be in a hotel for a week of his stay in California because he'll be taking a class that is too far away to drive to from SF everyday. So I get a little break during his stay, he gets the little shampoos and we all walk away happy.

*My grandma was a vaseloholic too and told my sister to put some on her doll's hair so it would lie flat. Under no circumstances should you ever do this. That doll's hair was never the same again. It became know as the doll with the messed up hair.

March 31, 2005 | Permalink

Comments

so many comments so little time

Enjoy your visit.

Posted by: Tom | March 31, 2005 at 11:27 AM

You know, I love my family, but I rest assured in the fact that I don't have to like them all the time. Vaseline is a Good Thing (tm). Just don't eat it. :)

Posted by: Secret Pal | March 31, 2005 at 04:50 PM

DUDE. My grandmother (of blessed memory) swore by vaseline. She used a thin layer on her face every night before she went to bed. And her skin was beautiful. I could never do this, as I have oily skin, but it worked for her.

As another Midwestern grl, um, I live for vaseline to take care of the rough bits and cracked lips!

Viva Vaseline!

Stacy

Posted by: stacy | April 01, 2005 at 09:05 AM

I think I might know that family who has the vaseline problem... hmmmm

Posted by: Jonathan | April 01, 2005 at 09:34 AM

my mom is a vaseline user and i still shudder at the thought of her kisses! ick! i did find a good use for it, though, in our very first apartment -- if you put it in cracks and such, ants can't/won't cross it! (and i had bunches to stick in the kitchen cabinets because i acquired the hugest container of the stuff when we cleaned out jamie's parents' bathroom cabinet o' fun! it was probably from the '80s!)

Posted by: cheryl | April 04, 2005 at 09:26 PM

Okay, I promise, last Vaseline comment, but I just developed this nasty cold with perma-running nose. Guess who my new best friend is with chapped lips and nose?!! You guessed it! Vaseline. One night and I was 95% better!

:-)

Posted by: stacy | April 06, 2005 at 01:10 PM

vaseline is a gimmie. but what about vicks vapor rub? to this day i love rooms all steamy and warm from the tea kettle and miss the smell of vicks vapor rub that my grandmother used to rub on my chest.

ps. does this make me new fangled or just high falutin' that i think aquaphora is even better than vaseline?

Posted by: akemi | April 08, 2005 at 11:50 AM